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Jesus:
Hey, is there any way I can disown the Duggar family?
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Judas:
You mean the "18 kids and counting" freaks?
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Jesus:
Yep. Those dudes.
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Judas:
Sure thing! Wow... I'm actually really impressed that you'd want to do something like that.
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Jesus:
Well, y'know... I'm having to send them, like, 20 birthday gifts a year.
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Judas:
So.... this isn't down to some ideological difference you guys have?
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Jesus:
You've got to factor in Christmas, too.
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Judas:
But you have no problem with their belief system? The way they twist your words?
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Jesus:
What's there to twist? I said "be fruitful and multiply" and they freaking *did*. Like, a lot.
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Judas:
Right, but... you don't feel like it's a little irresponsible? What if all those kids end up on welfare?
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Jesus:
So what? The family pay taxes, right?
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Judas:
Actually, no. They had their house declared a church, so...
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Jesus:
See, that's what I like about the Duggars -- they're *crafty*.
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Judas:
If you like them so much, why disown them over the gift thing? Why not just declare Christmas and birthdays to be gift-free?
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Jesus:
Whoa! Whoa! Let's not go crazy, now. I enjoy *getting* gifts, just not *giving* them.
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Judas:
"Faith, hope and charity", huh?
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Jesus:
Shh. "18 Kids and Counting" is on.
