Judas:
I see. And that means you're allowed to skip out on chores, does it?
Jesus:
Well, seeing as I'm going to be nailed to a cross for your sins, yes. Yes it does mean that.
Judas:
Yeah, how's that going, by the way? Because I noticed in your diary that you were meant to hang out in Gethsemane today and have a chat with some Roman guards, but instead you've sat here playing Mario Kart all afternoon.
Jesus:
Fuckin' blue shells.
Judas:
Yes, we all hate the blue shells.
Jesus:
Wait -- you've been reading my diary? How could you!?
Judas:
Well, it did seem like an invasion of your privacy. At first. But then you kept leaving it around, and making a big show of writing in it, and picking it up and saying "Oh, I nearly forgot to take my diary. I wouldn't want anyone to read my diary. I have so many personal secrets."
Jesus:
Well, I do.
Judas:
Your biggest secret appears to be that you think writing an extremely boring diary will get you some attention. And also that you pick your nose and eat the boogers sometimes.
Jesus:
It's nutritious.
Judas:
Well, I'm glad you're getting those nutrients, since you'll need lots of energy to *do the damn dishes*.
Jesus:
I'll get some angels to do it.
Judas:
Great. Because I really want to spend my Saturday cleaning up feathers and amyl nitrate.
